a few weeks ago, about ten girls from my school went to this dance (beyond our school) and had a lot of fun. we danced and talked, and spent about three hours there. one time a guy came behind me and we danced...for almost three songs. afterwrds, i was almost in tears. scratch that. i WAS in tears because i felt like a slut. i had a great boyfriend then grindded with some guy i had never met for three songs. i am now friends with him, and we talk on fb every once in awhile. anyway, last week i got a text from my best friend saying-
';me and some ppl have been talkin and we agree tht u flirt way to much and txt guys all the time. and tht at the dance wen u were grindin tht u were cheatin on ***** and we dont think its tht cool. and its getting out of hand';
i got very upset, especially since i had already felt awful about the dance. but she had to go and make it worse. we had a solid two day fight, but i honestly don't think i have fully recovered.
i will owe up to texting a lot of guys, but they are my friends. i am one of those girls who get along with guys better than girls because of drama, etc. there is one guy, who i had a thing with earlier this year, but crappy rumors were spread and we couldn't handle it. so it never worked out. he still really likes me %26amp; hes a great guy, but i like ***** sooOO much more.
this year i have realized i am much more of a flirt than i mean to be, %26amp; i mess with that one kid, but we are really tight. all my friends encourage that tht girl was over reacting %26amp; i am finee. but it bugs me knowing there are others who agree. yet she wont name any.
please help? i have no idea what to do. should ignore her? be more self-aware about flirting? was what happened at the dance wrong? )': desperate need of advice. thankss in advance.Am i a flirt? cheating? too much? girls %26amp; guys opinions please. urgently need some advice...?
be aware of your surroundings. respect yourself and the word love, don't use it if you have to question it. if you're doing something or saying something you wouldn't say in front of your boyfriend, then chances are you shouldn't do/say it. loyalty isn't based on how many times you text each other, it's the way you respect and uphold one another when you're together OR apart. i remember being younger in school and all the drama- frankly, no one else should be in your business unless you run your mouth about it all over town, so keep it to yourself and your man. maybe that girl didn't have bad intentions, she was probably just being outspoken, but forgive her and move on. seriously- think about your actions and the way it would feel if your bf did the same to you. what goes around comes around, and if you start to disrespect him, you'll definitely get disrespected back. men have feelings too!Am i a flirt? cheating? too much? girls %26amp; guys opinions please. urgently need some advice...?
Claire, Kat, Chikim, %26amp; Kelle Belle- i'd like to thank youu for all of your advice %26amp; opinions too. i have really thought about this, and will stay with my boyfriend, although i'll deff. be more self-aware about my actions from now on. and forgive my friend. Enjoy your lives(:
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C Squared House of Pancakes- 鈾?ahahaha. love youu, babe. thanks for the opnion. i'll tell youu my plan later(:
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Why don't you talk to your boyfriend about his feelings? Frankly that's the only opinion that matters in all this.
Firstly. That girl is a stirrer and you weren't cheating! She probably wants your bf.
Some people are natural flirts (I can't even tell when I am lol) and that doesn't make you a bad person or a slut, just comfortable around guys. Dancing with him was a baaad idea, but it's in the past. That girl needs to get over herself. There is probably nobody else who agrees with her.
It's not your fault!!!!
You tell him the weights good push him off and make him swim back by chance he'll float a bit cause hes chubby as we take two to st ! Boy that 'll be fun! They'll get him all rallied up , then I''ll say , Baby why you so mad ! You got your work out , Tost ya Ma r!
I don't feel like you did anything bad. However, I do feel like you should let your boyfriend know that you have a lot of guy friends and that you do speak to them and contact them on a daily basis. That way he understands that you wouldn't do anything to cheat on him. I did this with my boyfriend because I have always been that girl with all of the guy friends because I do diesel mechanics and haven't had a lot of boyfriends, but I did feel like I needed to be honest with him about all of my guy friends. The dance thing, if your boyfriend wasn't there, then you dancing with any guy to have fun with at the dance is not a bad thing either. Your friend sounds like she needs to take a huge dose of reality and suck it up. You have already stated that you don't have any feelings for these guys that you contact and that should be just that. So what if you dance with them or talk to them everyday, as long as you are honest with your boyfriend and he knows where you stand. The flirting could be taken down a notch, but you are not that bad with the flirting thing. I hope this has helped.
i know what you're going through because i act like you except me and all my guy friends look like we're dating because down the hallway we'll hold hands or he'll have his hand around my waist. just make sure you're boyfriend is aware that you have a lot of guy friends and that it may seem like you like them you only like him. and be careful about dancing with other guys that could get you in some trouble with your boyfriend but if he doesn't ask don't tell him
I think the whole dance thing was only out of line just cause of the fact that u felt bad afterwards. then that just means that it was a bad thing to do. And maybe ur friends r right i mean if u really feel there ur friends and they only want whats best for u then maybe they r right. U should control yourself next time. If u really like this boyfriend of Ur's and u never felt that way for anyone else than i think u should stop flirting with other guys and text with them so much cause if u really care about him and don't want to lose him then stop and if u can't control yourself then just stop text in them. And if u feel like u can't cause u like to flirt and text other guys a lot then maybe u shouldn't have a boyfriend. cause its not fair to the boyfriend. if u want to have fun and be young then do it but u can't be this way and have a boyfriend. but if the problem is just that u want to text with ur man and talk on the phone then just tell him that u think that u and him need to spend more time together and text and talk on the phone.
Hey C squared House Of Pancakes, haha you know who this is, and I think that you WERE NOT A FLIRT. That other girl needs to chill out. haha i think you need to talk to him and ask if he thinks you are a flirt because you text your guy friends. see you @ school!! ((:
To answer your question I will not sugar coat anything.. Yes you are a flirt and I would consider you dancing with the other guy cheating. Well, even flirting is considered cheating, BECAUSE you are being unfaithful to your boyfriend. I say this because you were being unfaithful to your boyfriend. If your boyfriend went around texting girls all the time and danced with some random girl then became friends afterward how would you feel? You always have to put yourself in the other person's shoes. I know if my girlfriend went around doing that I would be pissed. I know because I broke up with my girlfriend because she had similar problems like you. Except she didn't even realize she was wrong at all.(How stupid can one be not to realize their own F* up?...btw you're different.. at least you realized something)
Look, you remind me a lot of my ex.. Don't make the same mistakes. Guys have human emotions and in all honesty I feel bad for your boyfriend that he has to go through with all these. You say that you don't hang out with girls because of drama, but look at what you're doing? Don't point fingers and look for a way out.
This however doesn't mean don't make friends at all. Some guys are probably getting the wrong impression too. That you want to cheat. I'm guessing that your girl friends told you that because even the guys were talking about it. Just remember, the reason why most relationships goes bad is because of the small things that builds up.
Like I said this is no sugar coated form of me telling you. If you messed up, I don't think people should say it's okay or anything to comfort you. Take it to the heart and keep it there so you won't mess up next time. I hope this helped. Good luck!
Girls who only get along with guys and not girls are because they use guys to get attention and to feel better about themselves.
Sorry, but while I do believe two friends of the opposite sex can be friends, I would never believe someone who piss and moan on how they can't have friends of their own sex, only the opposite.
To me, that says that there's something seriously wrong with their personalities. Having female friends are amazing because unlike guys, we usually sympathize and ';get'; what other girls go through everyday... To get that from a guy, he'll have to be gay or at least live with a lot of females his whole life.
I know I'm being a bit cold right now, but you have to face he truth; What you did was despicable. Your boyfriend is going to get his heart broken once he realizes you can't be loyal to him because your self-esteem is so low that you have to bring misery on others like your bf to make yourself feel better.
If I were you, I would break up with your boyfriend so he can find someone else, and get into psychotherapy. You need help.
the girl did slam you pretty hard, and from the looks of it, you don't flirt. Just ignore her. You already felt bad about doing that, and tell people who bug you, that. Don't feel bad, everyone makes mistakes. Just move on from the dancing story, and focus on what you need to be doing.
hope this helped!
Be more self aware.
Guys and girls can be friends but from the things you dropped: 'the texting other guys because you're bored and your guy doesn't text you, the grinding, the 'messing with one kid'...it sounds like yes, you are flirting. While you may be a natural flirt yu need to take a look at yourself. If all your close friends are saying something and it's about your behavior, then give yourself a harsh once over.
I'll be honest, it sounds like you like male attention and when you don't get much from your boy, you find others and overstep the mark. And grinding another guy *did* overstep the mark. Had it been for a few seconds and you stepped away and said 'I have a bf', it wouldn't have been but three songs! You were enjoying the attention. You have to admit that to yourself.
Stop looking at what people may or may not be saying and who is saying it. Your friends will be talking about you and judging you if they deem you inappropriate, you have to live with that and move on. If you don't think you are, get better friends. But in all honesty, looks like you like the attention and you may be (are in the case of grinding).
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